Dungeon of Pain

A few days ago I posted on Facebook:Avoiding Connection

“For some reason, humans hold onto past pain to justify present behaviors.


So many responses; it was amazing. And, interesting.

Victoria’s response would best summarize the majority of the comments:

Fear-Relationship manFear and uncertainty.

Holding onto what you know seems easier than change- even when it’s for the better.”

That’s for sure. Unfortunately, our fear of a recurrence of past pain, is what leads us to behave in ways that will virtually guarantee a repeat of the pain, whether in a new, or an ongoing relationship/situation. At first, this may seem illogical and certainly irrational. Yet, it’s true.


Strangely, our fear of disconnection leads us to disconnect. Our fear of dysfunction, leads to dysfunctional behaviors, literally shackling us in a dungeon of pain, sadness, emptiness.

Paulo Coelho, one of the worlds best known authors, wrote, “Make peace with your past so it won’t destroy your present.”  

Most of us learn this lesson the hard way, including many of my clients.

young woman with her head in her hands

Permission to Live feels GREAT!  You can get there by learning and applying The Four Keys.

Call me. Let’s get you unshackled and out of that dungeon.

Let’s get Permission to Live!